Zen and the Art of Speedskating

There are 2 kinds of respect in the world, respect flavor #1 is the kind you feel for someone who is doing something you can’t imagine what it’s like, like a gymnast doing a triple twist off a pommel horse.

Respect flavor #2 is the kind where you have done the activity, and can accurately imagine what an individual is experiencing. I am getting to the point where I can look at some world cup level skaters and think, “yeah, I can picture doing that, I am a few steps slower, gosh I respect them, but its within the possibilities of what I could someday do”.

However, the winningest world cup skater ever, Jeremy Wotherspoon, has shown up for some training with the US national team. I watched him do a stunningly fast 800m, and upon hearing the times yelled out by the coaches, I felt a heaping serving of respect flavor #1! If ‘Spoon took off that Canadian national team suit and exposed a superman logo on his chest, many would not be surprised. He actually looks like he comes from the same physical mold as Wayne Gretzky, He is very tall, wide-eyed, long legged, and insanely talented. Nice guy too. After practice was over, I told him I can see that he is working very hard by his facial expression, but it’s amazing how smooth his technique remains. He smiled and said “That is the trick, really.” Very few skaters just leave me slack-jawed with awe when they really air it out, Casey Fitzrandolph is one, Jeremy is another.

I also asked Chris Needham why his ever-present Boston Red Sox cap is never torn from head by the wind during workouts, even at the warp-speed velocities that earned him National Sprint team status. He removed his hat, rubbed his hand across his thin buzz of hair, and said “its not hair, it’s really Velcro!”

I put some extra internal pressure on myself today as well, Frank Day, owner-inventor of Powercranks, and one of my sponsors/web design clients stopped by the Oval, on his way back from an expo. It was great to see him. Powercranks are tremendous training tools for skaters, especially in the early season. They condition the hip flexors & hamstrings like nothing else, & cut about .5 off of my opening 100m last season. If you survive the ego-killing adaptation to them, they are amazing. I know about a half-dozen speedskaters who use them, ranging from short trackers to marathoners & coaches. I spend lots of time on mine from April through July. Frank is a good guy, and I am also great friends with his #2 man, Andrew Weber.

I put self-inflicted pressure on myself to skate really well that practice, especially as Frank was there with his video camera. I flew for most of practice, but right at the end of the workout, it’s came my turn to lead our group at top speed; my legs started to burn in the first corner, in the final corner my technique came completely apart, and my new Russian training partner (& the second fastest russian sprinter in the world) Sergei Kornilov went flying by me, I struggled and stumbled to a time much slower than I expected of myself. I was furious. Angry that I could not perform when I really wanted to throw down a good time in front of someone who believes in me.

Boris was very happy with my times, Frank was impressed seeing what I do in person, & what a world class speedskating facility looks like. But I had put myself in “race-mind” and failed, I asked of my body and it could not deliver the way I wanted.

Later that evening, during workout #2, pissed at that physical meltdown earlier, I consciously picked up my intensity & speed every moment I felt tired, My body and mind began to have this conversation every time I was about halfway up the nearly vertical hill I was running up.

Body: I can’t do this! This HURTS!!

Mind: Go Faster! Loser! Don’t EVER get passed again like you did today! WORK HARDER!!

Body: Lactic acid burn!! Danger!! Exceeding muscular limits!

Mind: Fuck off, weak loser, PICK IT UP!! MORE!!

Body: really? Ok, how’s this, Heart Rate of 194!!!

Mind: Ha! That’s nothing! More footspeed!

Body: You just earned yourself tunnel vision for the last 50m of this hill!

Mind: Who needs to see? I am not here, I am in the last 150m of my 1000m race at Olympic trials!! I am strong and moving FASTER!!

Body: Think you are so cool, playing mind games!! fine! I am now removing all sensation from your legs except for scary pins & needles.

Mind: HA! BUT I AM STILL INCREACING MY SPEED!! Here is the hilltop! YEAH!!

Body: have some involuntary retching, compliments of me… plus you get to walk like a bowlegged drunk cowboy for the next couple of minutes.

Mind: See, you can do it, you should be proud.

The body doesn’t say anything to this final taunt from the mind, & grimly releases loads of endorphins to heal the mind/body rift

Filed under: sweat