Foundations
It’s fascinating to watch kids learn by imitating their parents, and watching RZ trying to pick up bowling balls was hilarious. The only thing funnier was that Jess & I are such terrible bowlers, the only thing worth imitating was laughter.
But on a serious note, I think a lot about what kind of “foundational” sports I will introduce her to, before she is old enough to pick her own favorites, and before she really knows if she is “crazy competitive” like her parents.
I am thinking about hockey, dance, or the martial arts. Weight bearing sports with lateral strength components, + bonuses like hockey gets you the team stuff, dance gets you art-athlete intersections, and martial arts are really important for young people in so many ways.
Yes, she will have inlines as well. In fact, thanks to my dear friend Kate, she already has a pair waiting.
any advice? Thoughts from experienced parents? Any “sports-parent traps” I need to be careful to avoid?
Filed under: from the coffee shop
I would strongly suggest Squash.
It’s a great “all-around” sport - agility, speed, explosiveness, power, endurance, “touch”, flexibility etc. AND, the most important component (and there is some real truth to this), an appeal to the ivy league schools. If you’d like RZ to someday attend one of these schools (Dartmouth, Yale, Princeton, Harvard, Columbia, Brown etc.) she would do well to intimately “acquaint” herself with this sport.
One other word of advice that could be a “sports-parent” trap is the expectation that she will want to be involved in sports as much as you and Jess. She may have no interest at all (although it’s not looking that way) but… you never know.
stay away from us speedskating lol
Reading this reminded me of my own kids athletic foundations, soccer was a big one as was T-Ball, which still makes me chuckle when I think of my 5 year old daughter deciding that outfield was more glorious when you did cartwheels, picked dandelions and finally sat down to take a rest (the whole team followed her lead) Imagine the coaches dealing with 9 kindergarteners sitting down and refusing to get up in the middle of the game .
My favorite though was introducing them to hiking. They loved to scramble up rocks and sit and have a snack of M&M’s and watch the hawks up close at the top of the ridge or fish for stuff in a tidal pool. We would picnic, sketch, take pictures, pick bluberries…they still love it and still go with us every chance they get even at 22,20,18, and 15.
I could write a long post on encouraging girls and sports. My first answer would be exposure to LOTS. Second would be it has to be something that you as parents can reasonably take her to/afford. (eg. soccer can be all consuming for a family for four seasons of the year) Third it needs to be something that she has a reasonable chance of success. Fourth for younger children it should have a larger component of all over body development and cardiovascular.
Fifth–don’t take it too seriously. Look at the age you took up speedskating.
Gotta get her in gymnastics, somersaults, kartwheels, and flips into the foam pit are where its at! Swimming and I’d say something for all seasons before coaches start telling her to “choose” when one sport spans the whole year!
And then again, she might throw you a curve. She might hate competition.
Perhaps she’ll be someone who hates to get all perspirey and would just as soon go off in a corner and read a book. Or be an opera singer! Get ready for the unexpected!
Thanks for the feedback all, Jess & I are taking it to heart.
So many comments here ring true, RZ is her own person, and we just need to be open to her personality & where it takes her/us.
And I want to say publicly, since my mom chimed in here–
Thanks mom for letting me find my own way with sports, and taking me to all those road trip hockey games & 5am practices,
Yes, I found speedskating late in life, but it’s because of the life you enabled, it allowed me to go fast when I had the chance.
FYI - I like Speedskating Canada’s Long Term Athlete Development Plan. I think they have some really sound advice for parents of kids.
http://www.speedskating.ca/LTAD.cfm and also: http://www.canadiansportforlife.ca/
I think it’s important to not have kids specialize too early. With respect to speedskating, I find most kids will not stick with speedskating through puberty. But other kids come to the sport at puberty. And if they do, they’ll stick with it a long time.
My two cents while I have three teenagers, Peter
………for pre schoolers: gym and swim programs with Mom and Dad at a Y or community center……
……..save soccer, skating, t-ball or any group sports til school age………
………leave one season of the year with no organized sport so you can do family adventures (like hiking in the mountains, swimming in lakes) on a whim and as the weather suggests.
If the whole year is ‘orgainized’ then dinner time or early mornings are ALWAYS hectic………….
leave time for imaginitive play and let fun come first……
listen to RZ, but if she doesn’t like something the first time out, finish the session and determine what she thinks then…..some people really don’t like to be cold/hot/wet/muddy and others thrive when cold/hot/wet/muddy
Rz might find an activity you never thought of………we have friends whose daughter chose highland dancing…….
PLAY !!! PLAY !!! PLAY !!!
Get her into ski jumping at a young age!! What a cool sport…I think by the time shes old enough women will be allowed to ski jump in the Olympics
it doesn’t matter — watch her and you will know what she needs (you already do that and she’s beautiful and perfect) — i know, a bit sappy, but….
Adorable photo - still waiting for the right guy to come into my life (yes Andrew, I finally realized that “he’s just not that into me”, and that I definitely deserve to be treated better than this), but I’m eager to do the parent thing when that does come to pass!
I’m a big fan of variety when young - I didn’t start figure skating at a competitive level until I was 11, and it was a great choice. Before that, it was gymnastics and swim team. I definitely do recommend she at least learn to swim, I think of learn-to-swim as a requirement - hopefully they’ll never be called upon to use it in an emergency, but it shocks me every time I hear of a person drowning because he/she never learned how to swim.
Now I’m gonna get into trouble - but — for girls, think very hard before suggesting gymnastics, ballet, and figure skating. The potential for injury is pretty high, and all of these have what I call the “starvation culture”. One of Lexa’s friends was told that if she wanted to be competitive in gymnastics, she’d have to accept growing up a couple of inches shorter and significantly lighter-boned than would normally be the case, because she’d be training so hard so young.
Then, let her try things. Find out if she’s into individual or team activities or both, is she’s competitive the way you are, or recreationally inclined.
By all means, exploring the world together, mountains to tide pools, is a big win. It’s something you can do on the same level as a little kid, and when they’re very little, being with you is the best and most important thing. Being able to show her stuff will help build the legend you’ll need so much when she hits 13.
Look how BIG she is! WOW!
It is Leonid night. I always think of (1994?) motorcycles onto the plain, trying not to fall asleep in that field b/c how many would I miss?
Thank you for that. It goes down as one of my favorite little adventures…
Thanks for all the input. I also am really leery of ballet, gymnastics, and soccer because of potential for injury. I have most knowledge of ballet. I know that a bad ballet teacher can really wreck your body. But a good ballet teacher can do a great job. I’m sure the same applies to gymnastics, soccer, anything.
I have a bias towards modern dance and martial arts. I loved modern dance because my teacher emphasized creativity and individual expression. Martial arts gave me a confidence that prevented me from getting mugged or messed with on the streets of NYC. RZ may not be into any of the above.
I have a bias against any sport that is asymmetrical, such as tennis or speedskating. I totally agree with all of you who said to just look at the kid and see what they like, what they tend towards. I will aspire to that.
You will probably have an active kid so you will need to limit how many activities you try to do in the same season(we used 2-3); kids will go till they drop and drop you along the way. I tried to keep Katherine in something for several seasons to get the learning/muscle memory going. I remember getting aggrevated at Katherine for taking her to skating and skating meets and not feeling like she did well or performed to my expectation. I am competitive but I also worry about a kids self-esteem and feel I can see the ‘light’ go out when a kid lowers their expectation of winning or doing well. At some point I asked Katherine if it was fun to be beaten and just compete. It was that point where she started trying hard at practice instead of goofing. Kids need to be taught and led but not pushed and how you find that happy medium is the fire and ice of it. Are we here to entertain our kids or to teach them how to excel and become better at things than their parents were? I see it as a journey in learning and learning can be fun and a shared experience. It’s not important to win but to improve or to advance your knowledge base(the end game). In the end you provide the basics for a love of sports or active living and the tools to be happy, be fit, be healthy.